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Hello friends and strangers i feel like this video probably is going to attract some new viewers so welcome to my channel my name is ashley i talk about spirituality personal development i do some um just fun mindless content as well i like to cook i do it all so welcome today i am talking about why i chose to get off my medication if you watch my video on ciprolex
Lexapro estee lauder prime whatever you want to call it i did a video where i pretty much logged my entire journey with ciprolex and i talked about why i got on it what it was like getting on i documented the first like few months of it i did an update i talked about the side effects if you want to know about the drug and my own personal experience with it check
Out that video if you want to know why i chose to get off the medication keep on watching okay so i wrote down some notes that’s just water sorry about this ring in the screen by the way it’s probably so distracting because even in the viewfinder i’m looking at it and i hate it what can we do with that ah okay okay perfect i wrote down some notes because i didn’t
Want to forget to talk about anything some questions i had for myself so the medication i was on was ciprolex that’s the brand i was on but it also can be referred to as lexapro that’s a different brand but the drug itself is called escilator prime mascara brand i don’t know how to say it i was on 10 milligrams of cyprulex okay i started off with five and then i
Brought it up to ten again that’s all discussed in the first video so i was on 10 milligrams for nine months or so i literally just got off about a month ago and oh my god it has been a ride we’re going to talk about that but first i want to talk about why i got off the medication because i find that a lot of people i talk to about this drug experience something
Similar and i experienced it a few times on this drug still what i was feeling after about nine to ten months on this drug was melancholy i found the perfect word for it melancholy it’s like i’m happy but i’m sad you know what i mean it’s like overall i look happy i seem happy things make me happy but i’m sad i had this like looming sadness over my head and
This didn’t start until like seven to eight months in um it slowly kicked in and i just felt like every day was just the same day over and over again i felt this weird sadness in the morning i just kind of woke up and just felt like hmm i guess i’ll just like do another day again and just blah i just felt dull i felt nothing i felt nothing uh i wasn’t crying
I wasn’t joyful i wasn’t excited i was just there like this is only 10 milligrams you know i was i mean it felt better than being sad and it felt better than being extremely anxious for sure if you’re going through depression listen i’m not a doctor i don’t want to recommend anything but if you’re going through depression i’m sure that like feeling nothing or
Melancholy is way better than feeling like depression but the thing is i wasn’t depressed i was sad when i got on it because i was going through a heartbreak but i was also really anxious and that’s why i got on it was mostly anxiety but through this time i’ve worked on my anxiety and my social anxiety so much and that’s the main reason i was on the drug so i
Was like you know what i’m feeling this weird blah dull melancholy and um i just kind of want to feel like a human again and if that means i’m a little more anxious that’s okay because i’ve worked on myself so much this year especially socially and i don’t feel like i need the drug anymore to interact with other humans which i don’t we’ll get there so after
Feeling like a robot for however many months i talked to my therapist and i was like i’m thinking of getting off i kind of want to be a human again i want to have emotions again i want to cry i want to feel excited i want to feel scared i want to feel angry like i’m telling you i was like i was emotionless the only feeling i felt was that weird sadness and i think
The sadness came from not feeling i was like uh i guess i’ll just like wake up i guess i’ll just do this i guess blah blah blah it was just like the same thing over and over again and i was tired man i was tired i just wanted to feel so again i talked to my therapist we cut it down to five milligrams for two weeks and then 2.5 for a week and then zero so i’ve
Officially been off off the medication for oh my god a month alexa what’s the date today today is monday it’s been exactly a month i got off the day before my birthday that was the day that i had not taken any pill for the first time not a half not a 2.5 so it’s been a month so that’s why i got off let’s get into what it was like getting off it was uh a lot um
Cutting down to five milligrams i didn’t feel much the only thing i felt was like i don’t know i felt a little more anxiety i was also overthinking my feelings i was like am i gonna feel this what am i gonna feel like i was so aware of the fact that i was getting off the drug part of it i feel like was placebo it was like me getting in my head expecting to feel so
I was like over analyzing everything that was going on um but on top of that i started to feel my anxiety creep back in and that scared me because i was like oh my god this is on five milligrams what’s gonna happen when i go back down to zero is my anxiety gonna get worse like what’s gonna happen i was so scared because like i felt my anxiety creeping back in for
Example my paranoia was like non-existent on sip relax now i deal with it on the daily um and that’s something that i’m struggling with that’s my biggest struggle it’s my paranoia my anxiety is getting better my social anxiety is like non-existent which is so crazy oh my god like oh my god like 13 year old me would not believe that i didn’t have social anxiety 20
Year old me wouldn’t believe it i just i i’ve really done the work in the past year and have a video on if you want to check it out on social anxiety and how to like get rid of it but anyways um yeah so like i felt my paranoia creep back in and i was scared because i was like oh my god i don’t want to live like this anymore i don’t want to live like this and i
Contemplated getting back on but i was like no i’m going to stick it out for at least three months and then make the choice so i continued getting off i started to feel weird i started to feel extremely irritable oh my god i had to warn my cousin she’s my roommate listen if i go off at you disengage do not entertain it do not listen to me i am sorry in advance
And i would be pissy i would be so mad i remember oh my god so the day i actually got off was uh valentine’s day right my birthday’s the day after she told me she wasn’t coming home so i mentally prepared myself to be alone all night i was ready to be alone i was watching a bachelor i ordered pad thai i was sitting down watching my show eating just so happy to
Be alone because she said she’s coming home on my birthday which is the 15th little did i know she meant midnight so it’s the 14th i’m thinking i get to go to bed i wake up you know i have three hours to myself and then she’s home this walks in at like 12 30 at night it still felt like the 14th to me so i’m like what are you doing here and she’s like i told
You to come back for your birthday and i was like what she’s like i told you to come back for your birthday what do you mean it’s midnight why are you here i was so mad as if she didn’t pay rent to live here i was so mad at her and she was like oh happy birthday and i was like thank you i was so pissed off looking back i don’t know why i cared i wasn’t doing
Anything it’s not like i was masturbating it’s not like i was like singing at the top of my lungs naked you know like i was just sitting and watching the bachelor with my food in my hand like i wasn’t doing anything weird i just was mad i was mad and then i was like oh why am i so mad the next day i woke up the first thing i said i’m so sorry about last night i
Don’t know why i was oh and then after sorry after that i left the living room and i went to my room and i closed the door because i wanted to be alone i don’t know why i don’t know why so yeah i apologize the next morning i was like i’m so sorry i’m still irritable because the medication i don’t know what came over me i was pissed off she was fine with it she was
Like so chill about it thank god because i was an i was just like so embarrassed like that i acted that way but i’m telling you i was so so so irritable i was so mad everything was making me mad to this day i’m still dealing with that it’s only been a month right so i think it’s still fleshing itself out of my system i’m still irritable i’m on edge sometimes um
Even today i was trying to merge on the highway and somebody like wasn’t letting me in i was so angry and i had to go relax actually just go in the next opening just drive through in the next opening that was a big thing the next thing i dealt with was i was overly emotional it’s like i was numb i was a robot and suddenly i’m hit with a wave of emotions not only
That but i was getting off the medication i started my period and there was a full moon it was a lot at once i was very emotional i was crying over everything i still kind of am i cry a lot more now i i happy i’m happy to cry like i like crying again because i wasn’t crying at all and i’m an emotional person so for to have that back is weird but also like refreshing
I kind of love it so yeah i mean i don’t love it all the time last night i was really sad so i’m feeling things again i’m crying again but the first three weeks was just non-stop crying non-stop anger non-stop irritability it was just too much i won’t lie it was too much i was crying about everything i was watching tv and i was start balling i was bawling my eyes
Out at the bachelor all the time i mean i love how many times i’ve mentioned that show i love the bachelor but like i don’t normally cry that much over it like what the hell like i was crying so much clayton went on a cute little date and i was like that’s so beautiful it was just one that like it was crazy like i was listening to big sean’s verse with queen naija
He has a song called hate our love with queen naija and he rapped about janae aiko and i was like this is so beautiful and then i played it for bread now because it was like so cute um it was just a mess so yeah you’re gonna feel overly emotional that’s sorry i went off in a long tension but it’s it’s a big part of getting off the drug so now that i’m off some
Things that i like okay i’m human again that’s great i have my libido back that’s great i feel things again wonderful i can drink again beautiful beautiful i can drink without getting sick i love that for me i do some of the negatives i’m paranoid again i am and it sucks i’m trying to work through that in therapy i just have like this weird paranoia i don’t
Know where it comes from it’s quite irrational and that’s why it bugs me had i gone through something traumatic to cause a paranoia i would give myself more grace i’ll be more patient with myself but my paranoia is extremely irrational so that’s been something i’ve been dealing with uh my anxiety has crept back up a little bit but it’s not too bad um and i guess
Like i don’t move through life as like confident as i was like like sipper likes makes you feel unstoppable you’re like oh my shoulders up bad energy just like wow i’m on top of the world i’m amazing everything’s great like that’s how you feel especially the first five months uh it kind of dies down a bit but yeah like i don’t have that like unstoppable confidence
Like i did but i still feel confident and beautiful and love myself and all that stuff but it’s just like it’s a different energy getting off was quite the experience emotionally with my mood mentally but physically nothing i didn’t get sick i didn’t feel dizzy i didn’t feel anything i just felt like you know oh i got my energy back i think zipperlex made me
Drowsy it made me tired because i found that i was always so tired and i thought that was just the first three weeks to a month and it just kind of kept going and i just got used to it but now that i’m off i have so much more energy so much more motivation like have you noticed how much i’ve been posting i got my drive back i have my work ethic back and don’t
Get me wrong ciprolex was great it improved my quality of life i loved it i stand by it i will probably i don’t know i will maybe end up on it again at some point in my life for me ziprlex gets me through periods of my life some people need it long term and that’s okay some people need it for 20 years and that’s okay i do not consider myself to be depressed so
Anything that ciprolex helps me with i’m working so hard on myself to do that for myself and for people who don’t know how to do the work on themselves or don’t want to ziprlex is great it’s beautiful but right now i just feel like in order to perform my best in my work life in my social life in any area of my life really it’s best that i get off it so i got off
It and i feel great i feel great i miss certain parts of it i do i really do sometimes but to me um i’d rather feel like myself again and i do so yeah so i just want to remind you guys i’m not a doctor i know you know that if i was a doctor my room would be way nicer my camera quality will be way nicer um very grateful for these things they’re beautiful don’t
Get me wrong i’m not a doctor so do not look at this video as me recommending or telling you what you should or shouldn’t do i know you guys are not stupid but for the sake of youtube i should probably just say this you know don’t listen to me as a reliable source of information on the drug go to your doctor contact your physician do what you got to do you know
So i just want to help you guys with my experience and when i felt so that you guys can kind of know what to expect when getting on or off this drug once again if you want to hear about getting on it i do have a video on that check it out but i’m officially off ciprolux and it feels good so yeah i’m gonna take my vitamins for now my stomach is rumbling i hope
You didn’t hear that i’m gonna take my vitamins for now drink my water and my business and be myself all 2022 so i hope you guys enjoyed this video thank you so much for watching and i will see you in the next one bye guys so
Transcribed from video
Why I stopped taking Lexapro/Cipralex By Ashley FloresliveBroadcastDetails{isLiveNowfalsestartTimestamp2022-03-26T140011+0000endTimestamp2022-03-26T141704+0000}
