stop skeeter he’s already dead
You know jimmy well i can’t say that you’ve never been responsible for helping out the town you also created or influenced the vast majority of major threats in the first place the yokians only came to retroville because of your signal the same goes for meldar prime the nanobots shirley and evil jimmy were all your creations you caused the ice age you created the
Sentient pants you made the sick patch you turn your teacher into a 50-foot monstrosity and you injured santa claus almost ruining christmas the vast majority of this town’s problems are caused at least indirectly by you and you know what in all honesty that would be fine you are very intelligent and you always do fix it and in the end it’s extremely unlikely that
You won’t end up benefiting the world a lot more than you will damage it my children and my children’s children are probably going to live in a world free of war and disease and i’ll have to thank you for that but dude you can’t keep using your intelligence as a way to escape your humanity i didn’t ask you to say salt because i thought a customer would seriously
Care or because i was insecure i did it because it made you look weird and i was trying to get you to adopt behaviors and use language that makes you come across like a normal person everyone knows what sodium chloride is but calling it that outside the context of a chemistry class makes you seem like someone who defines themselves solely by their intelligence
Which is undeniably who you are i know you think there’s nothing wrong with being that person dude but there is taking your iq and deciding that it elevates you above the rest of the planet is an awful decision that will lead to a life filled with misery and alienation it will color every interaction you ever have and make it impossible to have real friends or
Relationships i’m not saying that you won’t have any but they won’t hold any meaning to you and they certainly won’t bring you any happiness sure you’ll probably manage a pity to your sophomore year college after giving some drunk sorority girl jet pack ride but it will bring you nothing but emptiness maybe you’ll eventually abandon women all together and decide
That your true love is science secretly seething inside whenever you see a guy like nick or bolby getting married to someone he really cares about who cares about him you’ll say i’m exaggerating but dude look at how you treat the people in your life now carl and sheen quirks aside really do see you as your friend and they go through some serious if it meant
Helping you out of a scrape can you say that you see them the same way as anything other than the only two kids your age willing to put up with your ridiculous ego what have you ever done for them inventing doesn’t count dude even when you build something for someone else you’re really doing that for you every lamabot or ultralord simulator is only created with
The expectation of further praise they’re not friends to you they’re worshipers and your parents lord the way you treat them you think i’ve got folks that care about me the way your mom and dad do working in a like this i wish every day your dad watches you scarf down the dinner your mom’s slave to make for you and praise that you might think about spending some
Time with him instead of disappearing in your lab to do god knows what they watch you toy with dimensional warping science that they can’t wrap their minds around on a daily basis and you laugh at them for worrying about you have you ever played catch with your dad jimmy ever asked him how his day at work was you don’t have a clue what i do for a dad like yours
In my life dude and what about your mom why not invent something that’ll make her life easier instead of gallivanting around the bermuda triangle to play with seaweed we both know the reason she would thank you for it she’d be happy to imagine a version of you that thought for an instant about the needs of another person but she wouldn’t call you the greatest
Thing in the universe for it like your friends do and in neutron’s world whoever doesn’t do that might as well not exist ignore me if you want keep going the way you’re going and i’ll see you in 30 years looking around 16 nobel prizes in your pocket as if they could substitute for a lifetime’s worth of human love and interaction you always mocked calamitis for
His inability to finish what he started but the man had a wife and a daughter that tolerated him enough to want to stay in his life through everything and at the rate you’re going i’d be amazed if you can manage the same with goddard the rest of retroville jimmy they’ll never be able to do what you do they’ll never be able to invent rockets or solve cold fusion
Or add three numbers together but they will find genuine friendship and love and they will call it salt and despite everything you accomplish you’ll only be remembered as nothing more than the man who wouldn’t who couldn’t perhaps get out dude you’re fired big mcthankies for mcspankies
Transcribed from video
Sodium Chloride but Skeet CLAPS BACK!! By P.M. Seymour
